Jul 04 2008
Girlfriend Application
Some of you might have noticed how the number of archived posts has grown. Well that is because I was going back and converting some of our original posts to our current content manager. As I was rereading them, I came across a couple that I had forgotten about. They were about my dates with Jeanne and Megan.
After reading those posts again, I started thinking that maybe I could pull myself away from my video games long enough to spend time with a girl friend. But I find the entire process of finding one too much work. A while back I even decided to try a dating service and that was a big mistake. I dropped that quick.
So, after much thought (almost a full five minutes worth), I decided to create an application to be my girlfriend. All you the lovely, single, woman readers who are over the age of 18 are eligible to apply. I will then carefully consider each one and choose the best. In the case that there are more than one application that I consider to be the best, I will throw darts at them and choose the one that gets hit.
For those of you who are ready to have me be the man of their dreams, just fill out the application below and email it to me. Also, please include a photograph of yourself so that I can put a face with the application.
Name (First, Middle, and Last):
Date of Birth (month, day, year):
Street Address:
Have you lived at this address for the last six months?
Email Address:
Phone Number:
Hair color:
Eye color:
Ring size:
Shoe size:
Where were you born?
What is the highest level of education that you have completed?
If you have or are currently attending college, what is your major?
How often do you attend church?
Are you currently employed? If so, where? For how long?
Do you own a gun?
What is your favorite food?
What is your favorite book?
What is your favorite movie?
What is your favorite TV show?
What is your favorite sport?
What is your favorite color of lipstick?
Have you ever been arrested? If so, for what? If not, why not?
Do you have any psychotic ex-es that I should know about?
In 100 words or less, please discribe your dream date:
Lastly, please tell me in 100 words or less why I should choose you to be my girlfriend:
Disclaimer: Winning this contest in no way guarantees a long, happy relationship or marriage. I reserve the right to end the relationship when/if/how I wish.
One Response to “Girlfriend Application”
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Your goal seems to be well thought out, but I don’t know as I can say the same for the path. Perhaps you might consider another method.